The ‘King of the North’ seems to be taking his title a little too seriously.
‘King’ Andy Burnham hopes to be greeted by adoring crowds on his UK tour (Image: Getty)
Andy Burnham’s first major act after touring the Mediterranean with his family was to announce he’s going to tour the UK too. He’s calling it a “listening” tour, travelling Britain asking how we feel, and what we’re worried about today. It’s all very grand. Almost a bit royal. He’ll no doubt have a kingly entourage, while adoring fans follow his every wink and wave on TikTok and Instagram.
King Andy says he’ll be listening, but he’ll be talking too. He’s chosen his theme: the cost-of-living crisis. That’s a good place to start. Millions are struggling as prices continue to rise. Burnham reckons he’s made a bright start, by capping bus fares at £2, taking VAT off electricity bills, and making it easier to end costly subscriptions. Critics say it’s small beer, but that’s better than no beer at all.
Yet the cost-of-living crisis is a bit of a copout. Basically, it’s a subject everyone can agree on. We want it to end. All hail King Andy. There are harder, more controversial topics, but I wonder whether our merry monarch will be so eager to “listen” to complaints about them. Then take action.
What we used to call the ‘small boats crisis’ is now a terrifying ‘big boats crisis’, with 230 asylum seekers landing in a single boat yesterday.
But what will Burnham say when someone mentions the boats? As people will, given the chance. More importantly, what will he do? He can’t defuse this issue with a flicker of his famous eyelashes.
I suspect his grand tour carefully avoids towns and villages furiously protesting about local asylum seeker plans.
King Andy also has to listen to Britons furious over his decision to release murderers, rapists and police killers halfway through their sentences. How will he answer them?
He’ll be ambushed by everyone from embattled farmers fearing for their crops to eco-activists protesting at plans to approve more North Sea drilling. Neither will be fobbed off with gags about pub snacks.
Back in Westminster, tough decisions await. Such as whether to borrow even more money, as the national debt tops £3 trillion. Or slap a windfall levy on the banks, which may prove a crowd pleaser but could also strangle investment and growth.
All this is a lot harder than being bussed around waving at crowds and waffling on about how great it is to be king. If he’s expecting his people to bow before him, he’ll be in for a shock.
We already have a monarch in King Charles, who’s job is to rise above political debate. Burnham’s job is to dive headfirst into it. Instead of grinning for selfies he has to grit his teeth, and make tough decisions.
Burnham is getting ideas above his station. Ultimately, he’s just another politician. It’s a grubby job, and he’ll have to get his hands dirty. The country hasn’t got time for his lap of honour. We need action now.